Monday, February 20

Archeologists Uncover Rare Find: Mint Condition Conversion Van.

Heath, OH — Local archeologists were stunned by a recent discovery in a ACE Hardware parking lot this past Friday: A mint condition 1977 Ford Econoline Conversion Van. The find was somewhat ironic, given that the archeoligists were simply stopping at the local Quizno's restaurant adjacent to the hardware store to 'grab some lunch', when they noticed the van at the side parking area next to the ACE.

"This will put us on the map!" exclaimed dig leader and head of The Center for Archeological Whatnot at the Zanesville School for the Blind, Kevin Fox. "There's very little rust, and as far as I can tell, the eight track player is still functional. Boy, the research grants will be flowing in now!"

"We traced the vehicle's VIN number, and realized what we were looking at was a lost relic from the Disco Period. Even the faux woodgrain on the dashboard is fully intact, and the tie-back velour curtains show little wear and sun damage." Fox then triumphantly pumped his fist into the air.

Chris Donovan, a specialist in conversion van recovery efforts, was equally amazed. "Normally when simliar artifacts are uncovered, they reek of fucksweat and child vomit — this pristine vehicle is truly a rarity."

The 1977 Ford Econoline Wagon will be on display at the Center for Science and Industry in Columbus, Ohio from March 3 through March 17. Please contact them at 614.228.COSI for more information.