Friday, January 10

Loose stool pigeon on the runs.

HEATH, OH — Heath Police are concerned about the whereabouts of informant Lenny "Trotts" Trotter.

Some guy from the internet.
Trotter (not his real name) has worked with law enforcement since 2004. He recently disappeared from the Hebron road station during a routine interrogation.

"I had a few more questions for him, but he squirted out the back door." lamented staff sergeant Mark Bednarski, who was the last to see Trotter before he vanished. "Now, I'm just bracing for the inevitable shit storm."

The Heath police have valued Trotter's continued input on several criminal cases, most notably the repeated vandalism of The Havana Omelet Shop's front windows.

A visibly displeased Chief Alan Maybrooke was blunt about Trotter's disappearing act.  "This has certainly left a stain on our precinct."